Aylmer commemorates Denis Carbonneau

J-D Potié

Swept in grief, the Aylmer hockey community took to social media last week to mourn the loss of a man who dedicated himself wholeheartedly to his community. Long-time volunteer and invaluable employee of the Aylmer Minor Hockey Association (AHMA), Denis Carbonneau passed away on February 3. He was 71 years old.

The AHMA hosted a celebration of life the afternoon of February 16 at the Aydelu Centre, inviting the community to pay their respects to Carbonneau.

Playing an integral role as the AHMA’s registrar, scheduler, and equipment manager, besides being an unmissable fixture at Frank Robinson Arena for decades, Carbonneau contributed his heart and soul to the Aylmer minor hockey community for more than 30 years. On February 6, the AHMA announced the news on Facebook, spawning a wave of emotion from many who expressed their sympathies, sadness for the loss of a universally beloved man, and appreciation for the impact Carbonneau had on their lives and the community at large.

Numerous commenters highlighted Carbonneau’s contributions to growing local girls’ hockey, his role in organizing local tournaments, and the quality of his character, especially remembering his calm, kind, familiar presence in the pro shop of Frank Robinson Arena.

For Carbonneau’s close friend, Caroll Thouin, Carbonneau’s passing came with great sorrow. “I knew him for 25 years,” he said. “We were great friends. We coached together. He worked with me. We did golf trips together.” Operating the Frank Robinson Arena pro-shop and volunteering with the AHMA for many years, Thouin says he looks back on the times spent with Carbonneau very fondly.

From coaching girls’ youth hockey together, to co-managing the Aylmer girls’ tournament, to their everyday interactions in the pro shop, Thouin recalls Carbonneau always being there to help him out. “He helped a lot at the pro shop,” he said. “Whenever I couldn’t be around to sharpen skates, he would be there to cover for me. Whenever I had to be somewhere else, he would never say no.”

Carbonneau’s dedication to the AHMA was especially reflective in the quality of his work, in his tacit humility, and in the significance of the workload he managed to undertake, Thouin said. Anticipating the AHMA to find a suitable way to celebrate Carbonneau, Thouin believes Aylmer minor hockey would not be the same without him. “When we think of Denis, we think of hockey,” he said.

Carbonneau’s spouse of 12 years, Rachelle Gagné, says she certainly feels the same, noting that the two met while volunteering in the Aylmer girls’ tournament. Besides his blue eyes, his kindness, and his endearing sense of humour, Gagné said the most alluring aspect of his character was his soft-spoken intelligence. “Denis was a man of few words,” she said. “But when he spoke, you listened, because what he was saying was important.”

Seeing people react as they did on social media, Gagné said she was happy knowing the community was aware of and grateful for Carbonneau’s dedication to local hockey. “He really deserved those compliments,” she said. “That kind of recognition is very important.”

Missing his warmth, his smile and his sense of humour, Gagné says she most fondly remembers the times they spent travelling together, especially their vacations at his sister’s idyllic ranch in British Columbia. “Those were always our best trips,” she said. “There was always something to build. Once we even built a swing out of wood, from scratch … So, we have beautiful memories of him building things that are still at the ranch and that we can still use in memory of him.”

Grateful to see the community expressing such kind sentiments about her father, Carbonneau’s daughter Melissa says she wasn’t surprised by the reaction, considering that everyone he interacted with held him in such esteem. “It’s really touching,” she said. “But at the same time, I knew it. When I say my dad is my hero, there is a reason, because I know he impacted many people’s lives just because of the kind of person he was. It speaks to the goodness of his character.”

From the comments of the girls she played hockey with growing up, to a local Pee Wee team at a tournament in Mont-Tremblant posting a picture of themselves holding up a sign that says, “Thank you, Denis”, Melissa said the online reaction is a testament to her father’s intergenerational impact on the Aylmer hockey community.

Emphasizing her father’s uniquely generous nature, Melissa said she will always cherish the unselfish, hard-working, and positive example he set for others. “They threw out the mold when they created him,” she said. “He always wanted to help everyone. He put everyone before himself … He’ll always be my hero.”

Missing his presence, his smile, and his hugs, and especially the sound of his voice, Melissa says her father’s passing has left an irreplaceable void in her heart. “He always had my back. He was always in my corner rooting for me,” she said.

Carbonneau’s son Simon said he was also touched by the online reaction, happy to see his father’s memory celebrated with such an outpouring of gratitude and reverence by members of the community.

Noting that his father was never one to brag and boast, the reception was duly merited considering how long and passionately he dedicated himself to the AHMA, Simon said. “It’s great to see that people appreciated the work he did. That’s always nice, because it’s not something we talk about often, and because my dad was not the kind of guy to beat his chest. He simply loved the work he was able to do, and he was proud of what he did, knowing he was able to fulfill an important role.”

Looking back, Simon most cherishingly recalls the little everyday interactions he would have with his father. From hearing his sound advice on solving problems to being there to sharpen his skates, to having a simple conversation, Simon said he will dearly miss his father’s presence.

Noting that the loss of such a reliable friend and colleague has been particularly hard on the association, AHMA President Dan Dupuis told the Aylmer Bulletin that there aren’t many people like Denis and that it will be difficult to find anyone else like him. “He was doing the work of about three or four people at once,” he said.

From Carbonneau’s intricate orchestration of schedules on tightly organized spreadsheets to his unmistakeable reliability, Dupuis believes that what made Carbonneau unique was his passion for his work and his commitment to the association. “He was always going above and beyond in all aspects of his work,” he added. “He was a rare pearl.”

While nothing has been concretely organized, Dupuis said the AHMA is currently considering ways to honour Carbonneau’s life and his contributions to the community. “You can be certain that next year we will hold a ceremony to celebrate him,” he said. “And we also have the end of year dinner, where we’re planning to commemorate Denis.”