BETWEEN A ROCK AND A HARD PLACE  

Canada Again Faces Relegation in 2021 COVID-19 Vaccination International Football Championships: A Lighter Look at the Serious Situation    

Have you ever been caught in traffic and arrived late for a sporting event?  There you are waiting in line at the ticket box office to pay for the admission when you hear in the distance the noisy ovations  of the crowd cheering scoring plays, and you have no idea what just happened on the playing field?

Well, welcome to the political landscape of federal and provincial jurisdictions in health and social services in the Canada of 2021.  And you ask who are these players for Team Canada?

Wearing number 0 is the Right Honourable Justin Trudeau, Prime Minister of Canada, still fit and in fighting form: remember him winning that fund-raising boxing match against Québec Senator Patrick Brazeau, who was wearing a black belt in karate - must be almost a decade ago, and of course of the dynasty: P. E. T. delivering that impressive ceremonial kick-off at the 1970 Grey Cup Game in Toronto’s Exhibition Stadium more than fifty years ago.  The captain of Team Canada still possesses the foot speed as a half back to avoid the tackles of the Opposition.

Unfortunately, the slot back, # 00 - the Honourable Patty Hajdu, Minister of Health of Canada, keeps fumbling the ball on a regular basis keeping Team Canada trapped in its own half of the field. 

And on top of that, #000 - the rookie - the Honourable Anita Anand, the Minister of Public Services and Procurement of Canada, recovering from some sort of paralysis preventing her from heavy lifting with both her arms, keeps dropping the ball whenever the wide receiver is in the open, and normally would be gaining significant yardage.

And where is the relief from the farm clubs? Well the Captain of Team Québec, # 1, basking in a constant popularity rating averaging around 75 %, the Honourable François Legault.  (Please, I do not use the title of Honourable ever; the C. A. Q. is allergic to all vestiges of the English monarchy!), is curled up like a smiling Cheshire cat in front of his family’s cozy fireplace.

And the tested and true fullback out of Ford Nation, Team Ontario’s #1, the Honourable Doug Ford, having decimated the Liberal Party of Ontario to non-party status after the last provincial general election, is resting on his laurels in the G. T. A., and debating his future on the national stage, while the Honourable Captain Erin O’Toole is playing the role of Hamlet’s McVicker digging a hole with a pick and shovel.  For whom?  Poor Erin does not know, but we certainly do. 

And the Wyatt Earp of the Far West, the Honourable Jason Kenney, of Right Honourable Stephen Harper vintage, having served successfully as Secretary of State for Multiculturalism and Canadian Identity, Minister of Employment and Social Development and Minister for Multiculturalism, and finally Minister of National Defence, all without a fumble or a dropped ball.  Debating, with such a strong majority, whether he should appoint himself Premier of Alberta for Life! Or rather, report to the training camp and try to head Team Canada into the next International Football Championships!

  “Healthy citizens are the greatest asset any country can have.”      

- Winston Churchill